About me

I was born in England in 1958, and didn’t speak until I was six. Much of  my life has been spent studying what works to help me relate more effectively with myself, others and the world.

My life passions include: holistic birth; aware parenting; finding resilience; writing; heartful relationships and conscious communication; inner life mentoring; learning how to be fully present; and non-dual living.

In my twenties, in Virginia, USA, I completed a comprehensive teacher training course with a difference, which included: Effective Communication; Emotions Management; Inner Life work; Universal Law; and Dynamic Meditation. I later trained in: bereavement counselling; Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP); Focusing; Nonviolent Communication (NVC); and TRE (Tension and Trauma Release) body work… however, I consider LIFE itself ~ particularly birth and death ~ to be my greatest teachers.

In 1986, I became the first Midlands mother to give birth in water, which was reported worldwide in the Press due to a stunning picture taken seconds after our son, Benjaya, emerged. Ironically, our beautiful boy drowned in a local river when he was five. This was followed by two miscarriages… and finally, in 1993, thank goodness, our second son, Asher, was born safely in water. Experiencing the harrowing losses taught me the importance of living from my inner strength ~ learning that I love to share.

In 2002, I was blessed to join the extraordinary team of The Inner Resilience Program (IRP) in New York City, facilitating retreats for educators. For 14 years we supported participants to connect with their inner lives and, in the earlier years, helped them to recover from the trauma of September 11th. I was the grief consultant.

I have co-founded a few things in my life: MetaCentre: Foundation for Human Potential in 1984; BirthWorks in 1987, for holistic birth support and birthing pool hire; The Transitus Network in 2004, honouring the sacred process of living and dying and promoting death as a transition; and the Bowden House Community in 2005, an intentional eco-community in Totnes, Devon UK, where I still live and work. This is my playground for practicing and learning new relating skills.

Bowden House Community

Bowden House Community

Presently my offerings to the world are: Grief Support and guiding people through transitions; TRE (Tension and Trauma Release) Sessions; Heartful Relationship Coaching; Holistic Birth Preparation (the inner work); and my three published books ~ Benjaya’s GiftsMourning Has Broken, and Heart of Relating: Communication Beyond Ego.


Water birth photo that encircled the world


With my first son, Benjaya, who died aged five

With my first son, Benjaya, who died aged five


Carmella at a Press Book Party

At a Press Book Party in London

Book Links

  • Benjaya’s Gifts

      Benjaya’s Gifts is a captivating and intimate true story, which takes us on a journey into the heart of...

    Read more
  • Mourning Has Broken

      Mourning Has Broken is filled with stories told to the author by people from many walks of life and...

    Read more
  • Heart of Relating

      HEART OF RELATING enhances relationships by providing nitty-gritty answers to these questions… and more: 1.  How do I recognise and...

    Read more